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Friday, January 5th, 2007
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Tuesday, November 28th, 2006
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Screw you, Blogger, you won't load. I've just had one of those it's-not-a-fight-yes-it's-a-stealth-fight-look-out-its-putin-wtf?! fights, and I've been feeling all down and glum and what not. Or at least I was, until I read about someone's experiences with Cerebal Ballsy, so I'm in a considerably better mood.
Oh, and I just found out about this livejournal jabber server thing; which is pretty awesome.
So, to ask the obvious, what's the latest bad shit to happen to you lot? Wife died? Mildly insipid talk show host in morning? Someone etched their mark into your carpet with a plate full of icecream?
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Get chicken schintzel. Cut into chunks. Cook with chicken stock, lemon juice, and black pepper. Tasty.
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Thursday, April 20th, 2006
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... almost! That, and I can play the opening to Heart & Soul just a little bit.
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, February 22nd, 2006
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After being hit by a #$#$$#$# 4WD (SUV) driver on my bike just the other day, I give up. I hate the stupid people. I HATE THEM. I’m going to make it a personal goal to badger, harrass, annoy and otherwise inflict discomfort upon the UltraStupid. Especially if they are clueless. Especially if the cluelessness extends to their car ownership choices. Especially if that makes them drive like an old biddy in the bike lane without a care in the world.
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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Sunday, February 19th, 2006
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Tuesday, January 31st, 2006
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Monday, January 16th, 2006
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Monday, January 9th, 2006
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Monday, December 26th, 2005
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I became involved with a girl of late, and I got quite attached – but it’s not to be and she’s not for me. I can’t say much more and my poor friends have copped a lot of whinging. I need new people to meet and ways to achieve this goal, we’re back at square one :S
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Comments: Read 7 or Add Your Own.
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Monday, December 19th, 2005
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If you don't have a giant christmas elephant, you're missing out.
We recently rid ourselves of yet another batch of housemates, and are on the market for more.
They tried to do a runner on us: up and left, all stuff gone, in the middle of the day. Unfortunately for them, they didn't know that Chloe & I were determined and fierce.
We tracked them down in about 5 minutes (relative, last name, general area -> white pages -> map -> LETS GO CHLOE).
I can think of nothing as unsettling as the people you have run away from rocking up on your doorstep, hollering "Money".
Bridie, the female housemate, was always nice and we didn't really have any issues with her. Infact, we'd have kept her if we could have. We gave her the gist of it: Money. Money. Where is our money? We want our rent. Your lease is fucked. Money.
She was shook up about it, so we had the desired effect. We grab the keys, not a dollar to her name, and we get back into Chloe's little white car.
Have you ever seen pulp fiction? The bit where Butch (Bruce Willis) heads back to his place to get his gold watch? And he's made it, only to come to a crossroad and run into Maurice - the man hunting him. I was thinking about this, and infact mentioned it to Chloe, while we sat in her little white car waiting for a train to pass.
We turned up Goodwood road. We travelled along. I look over, and whom to I see: fuckhead, the useless waste of space. No one likes him, as far as we can tell: he's obnoxious and useless; won't lift a finger to help you and is about as trustworthy as a leaky seive when you're drowning.
Chloe does something resembling a tire-screeching, wheel spinning manuever, and we tear back down along the road: I'm pretty fucking pissed at the moment. You don't run away owing $500 or more, and I've been wanting to thump this useless prick's face in for months.
So he gets back from the shop, and walks up to his car. I yell. "HELLO". He's shitting himself a little bit; I suspect, 'cause we've tracked him down on the fucking street on the other side of town. It's magic. First thing I say. Me: "Your lease is fucked." Him: "What? Police what?" Me: "No you fucking idiot, your lease is fucked. We need any money you have right now for bills and we need your keys." Him: "We read that bit of paper we signed and it said we could speak to the landlords and everything about two weeks..." Me: "Shut the fuck up. I want my bill money. We're keeping your shit." Him: "You're gutless. I got screwed over on my job..." Me: "Gutless? Who's done a fucking runner when things have gotten too tough?" Him: "Don't give me that attitude or I'll flatten you." Me: "Oh that'll be real fucking smart. Go on, fuckhead, take a swing."
He won't be goaded: I stare him down and tell him to shut the fuck up and hit me. He tries all sorts of rubbish; he's the type that tries intimidation. We saw him use it on Bridie, and he wasn't getting away with it on us. I personally am twitching to have him crack me one, 'cause then I'll get to kick the shit out of his teeth AND get him on assault charges.
Chloe at this point tells him to shut his mouth about getting screwed over on his job; if you up and leave and don't talk to the landlords, that's called a runner and it's not fucking on.
We take the keys and stalk off.
Final Results: Them running off without paying money: -2 points to us. Them having paid alot of the past rent on the credit card: +3 points; they'll never pay of the debt quick enough. Us locating them within hours of them doing a runner: +5 points. Divide and conquer: each of them gets treated differently by us, each are told MONEY OR YOUR SHIT IS GONE. +5 points. Tracking down people on the street: +50 points - that's just plain fucking scary. Landlords now helping us extract bill money: +5000000 points. Running into them on Saturday when they are out: +999999 points; it's not that fucking bad to ram home a "this is our town, not yours" message by surprising them when they are trying to relax.
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Monday, December 5th, 2005
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Congratulations.
You're single again. All because some people can't make up their minds and stay made up. Fuckin' A.
It's 2:25am, I have work in 4.5 hours, and I'm going to be surly. Once again, I'm drunk as fuck; so I'll be arriving at work with a hangover. I have little doubt I will be fired in the near future, as soon as I'm no longer critical to the company. I've just been fired from a relationship because "maybe I can't provide the things she's looking for". Huh? What? She couldn't even cut the cord with any of her ex's, and she can't trust me?
Merry Fucking Christmas Monday - the cheeriest season of the year.
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Friday, September 30th, 2005
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Google it.
Currently, the 3rd result is owned by yours truely.
I'm also around #42 on MSN for "hot sex"
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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Sunday, August 21st, 2005
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Wednesday, August 3rd, 2005
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Well, compared to when I used to exist entirely upon two minute noodles and live in what I can only describe as “a small, boxy apartment”. Tax office stuff: Sorted. It turns out that they are still a pack of wankers, by a large, but somewhere, someone is actually human – I’ve gotten all of the fines revoked, and I found an extra $300 I’d paid way back when. As for work, I’ve been letting putting in for paycheques slide, I’ve got probably a month or so of pay saved – just by virtue of being too lazy to pick it up. My god, it’s… me… saving money. Automagically.
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Summary: Despite riding over an entire roundabout with the back wheel, I passed with 85%. It was the Dodgiest Driving I’ve Ever Done. I still have to wait several months to get my P plates which will allow me out by my self, but I’m not fussed. I have a certificate of [in]competency, and all is good.
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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But I’m back on the black round things passed quietly from shifty bloke to shifty bloke at raves. I mixed for about 3 hours today, flawlessly. I’m impressed.
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So I’ve done all I can. I’ll still be fighting this fight, but not so actively as the goon squad who are on it now.
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Summary: 78%, 2 instant fails, 14 faults. Fuck off I’m great, because I didn’t die and stuff. Sure I nearly killed some children. SURE I NEARLY CAUSED LIFE TO BE TAKEN. But… I still got 78%. Woo.
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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